Commencement: Stepping into the New

Seven years of university study has left me ready to take a break from school and enter the work force full time. I’ve been so blessed to be able to study at three different reputable institutions that have endowed me with an education not only in my area of study, but across other disciplines. Most importantly, I have further developed my ability to write, research, think critically and teach myself. These skills will serve me well in any vein I pursue. I've also learned to approach all weaknesses the same way I've successfully approached others- calmly, rationally, methodically and with fervor. I've learned that my insecurities and lack of trust in myself and my abilities has been one of the biggest things that has held me back. The pronouncements that I and others have spoken over myself  about my weaknesses only hold value in identifying what needs to be worked on and overcome. They are not facts that should or will exist forever. I am a work in progress. For twenty years I have been building on my strengths and improving my weaknesses. Why should any one weakness be termed impossible? Why should I just accept that I am bad in a certain aspect when improving is the nature of what I gravitate toward professionally and personally? My innate stubbornness and persistence when channeled in the right way makes me a force to be reckoned with. I have had to shift my thinking about certain things before I could start to even improve. I am not naive and understand just how much more there is to learn- to accomplish. I know what a truly solid education is- think a traditional, rigorous classical education. Though I am now called a Master, the more I learn, the more ignorant I feel, though it is said that this is a sign of wisdom.

During our commencement ceremony, a friend of mine mentioned in her speech that success and failure are both transitory and should not be treated differently. We must embrace our failures, learning from them and moving forward, just as we should embrace our successes, learning from them and moving forward. So for now, I celebrate, looking back on two years of blood, sweat and tears. These past two years stretched me in certain areas more than I have ever been stretched before, but I grew and finished well in every area, stronger than when I started. I believe that one semester of studying with my current teacher was the equivalent of my four years of undergraduate study. I am talking about my private lessons and of course not the rest of the academia or other parts of the university experience. Something I told my teacher recently was that even though I knew I wanted to study with him when we met on audition day, what I didn’t anticipate was that I would gain a mentor who cared so deeply, taught holistically  and would guide me beyond my years studying with him. Today, I understand more than ever how difficult the field I am in is and how much there is to be done, but also more than ever, the relevance, power and importance of what I am doing. 

What exactly that is will follow shortly, but for now, I celebrate and praise God for His providence, guiding hand, blessings and sustaining mercies that are new every morning. As I embark on a new chapter, that is thought of in the eyes of the world as insecure, not very profitable and seemingly frivolous ( I was asked yesterday if playing the violin is work- it's hard to believe, but true...), I am charged with this reminder while pursuing what God has placed before me: 

"Go sell what you have, give to the poor, and come follow me. That is, stop coveting wealth and security. Instead, start resting in the goodness of God alone. Stop letting your love of status and power and ease make you callous to the poor. The issue in your life is a failure to see and enjoy how good God is."